Tag Archives: Bonding

I don’t like breastfeeding

I said it.  I feel almost ashamed admitting it, because I feel like mom’s are “supposed” to enjoy the experience.  But I just don’t.  BabyMort eats pretty much every 2 hours.  Once at night she might go about 3 hours and she’s sporadically gone about 3.5 hours, but usually she’s rooting for food every 2 hours.  It takes her about 30+ minutes to eat and get burped and then we have to hold her upright for at least 15 minutes or she’ll spit up everything she just ate.  As a result, I spend almost half my day feeding with her.  Sneak in a little sleep, meals and a shower and I feel like I don’t have time to do anything else.

That is frustrating to me, but I don’t think it’s the reason I dislike breastfeeding.  I would say the two big contributing factors are that: 1) She’s started arching her back while eating, out of nowhere, taking me with her.  It hurts, and I know she doesn’t mean to hurt me, but oh man it HURTS!!   And it hurts through the rest of the time she’s feeding.  2) The other reason is probably linked to me being a control freak.  I hate not knowing how much she’s eating.  There are times when she’s acting hungry an hour after her last meal, and since I have no idea how much she eats at any time, I don’t know if she really is hungry or just needing comfort.  She tends to fall asleep while she’s eating, which only makes it harder to know if she’s gotten enough to eat.

I don’t plan on stopping.  I know this is what I want for my baby girl, but I can’t say it’s the great bonding experience that I heard so much about.

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Baby Slings

I really want to use a baby carrier with BabyMort – or “wear” her as the terminology goes.  There are certain benefits to baby-wearing that I’ve read over and over again.  Some of the benefits include:

  • A continuous daily relationship with a caregiver results in the most intelligent nurture of a young child. It also provides a constant and assuring presence.
  • A baby held in-arms, or worn in a sling or carrier, moves as a unit with the parent. The adult’s hands are free to care for older children and perform other tasks. Baby can calmly indicate when to be put down instead of crying to be picked up.
  • A baby whose cries are responded to promptly learns to trust. When children are accustomed to being comforted by people, not things, family relationships tend to remain simple.
  • Children integrated into the daily life of family and community have a tremendous educational advantage. Babies in-arms are mostly in a quiet alert state of consciousness, observing their surroundings from a secure perch. Older children learn lessons that are relevant and essential to their well-being.
  • Both parents and babies get their needs met by unhurried communication and humane interactions. The respect shown to small children by parents will reflect back on them in later years.
  • Wearing your baby helps harmonize your infant’s systems, because they mirror the caregivers movement, breathing, and heartbeat. These rhythms reflect the womb experience, easing the transition into the outside world.

A few of these reasons touch on this idea, but I think overall if would be a great way to bond with BabyMort.  Not to mention, it’ll leave my hands free to deal with curious and excited dogs!!

But so far, I haven’t managed to get any further than knowing that I want to be a baby-wearer.   You might be thinking, “What more is there to decide?”  Well, that’s what I thought at first too.  Turns out, there are dozens of different styles of carriers and slings.  Some are better for long-term comfort, others have easier adjustability and some are a better fit for a breastfeeding mom.  There are certain kinds that would be better for both DaddyMort and I to be able to use and others can grow with BabyMort better than some.  To top it off, I want to make my own sling (well, have someone help me make my own sling – I’m not exactly great with a sewing machine) because most slings cost at least $50 if not $100+ to purchase.  So, I have to factor in the ease of making it into my decision.

I would love input or opinions from any baby-wearers out there.  Anyone have any suggestions??

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