I am absolutely exhausted. Dead tired. Thoroughly beat. Downright tuckered out.
I thought I was tired the day after Prom in high school when I was basically up for 24 hours straight. I thought I was exhausted after working 31 our of 37 consecutive hours at the hotel one weekend. Even in my first trimester, I thought I was just plum tuckered out. I realize now that was nothing compared to how I’ve been feeling the last few days.
Unfortunately for those around me, that means I’m also crabby, testy, irritable or “sensitive” if you’re being nice.
My amazing husband (he really is) has the bewildered look down pat. I don’t blame him for looking at me like I’m crazy, because I feel a bit like that sometimes when I’m upset for no particular reason. He does what he can – rubs my back when I’m trying to get to sleep and preemptively brings me cookies or candy sometimes, assuming that I’m cranky. And for the record, bringing me baked goods or candy will cheer me up for a bit at least. My mom knows me well enough to count on this and brought chocolate cake when they came over the other night.
I blame my tiredness on the obvious – I am growing a baby!! – and the related, but less obvious. I have trouble falling asleep, because I have too much running through my mind – What do we still need to do to get the nursery done? Will I have a job after BabyMort arrives? What will we do about our finances if I don’t? Did I change the dog’s vet appointment? The list goes on and on… Once I’m lucky enough to fall asleep, I wake up because of heartburn, achey hips and/or back, because I have to pee, because I’m thirsty or because one of my extremities is asleep. Usually, once I wake up, I start thinking about all the things that kept me up in the first place and the fun starts all over again.
I have a plan to (hopefully) get at least a few nights good sleep though. I have yoga tonight and I usually sleep pretty well after that. Then I made a chiropractor’s appointment for first thing tomorrow morning, hoping that after stretching at yoga, he’ll actually be able to adjust me and relieve some of my back and hip pain (something he hasn’t been able to do since for 20 weeks now…) And the (chocolate buttercream) icing on the (chocolate) cake – I’m getting a massage on Saturday!! We’ll put blankets over the windows in the bedroom Saturday night so the rising sun doesn’t interrupt my slumber on Sunday morning and I’d be perfectly happy sleeping until Monday morning if possible 😀
Hopefully I’ll look something like this:
I had another doctor’s appointment today. I’m really hoping that our doctor will be around when I deliver, because he never fails to make me laugh. Today, he came in and started writing in my chart – putting down that it was my 30 week appointment. Then he stopped, held my chart up and said, “Well this is just wrong. You’re 75% done and we’re still on the first page, all black ink. I don’t feel like I’m earning my money here!” He proceeded to measure me and listen to her heartbeat. He said he’d take anything, “a yeast infection or a stretch mark. Just something so I feel better about taking the money.” After listening to her heartbeat, he let out a big, fake yawn and said, “30 weeks and the heartbeat’s 140. Boring…” Then we agreed that boring is good (even if he does claim to feel guilty!!)
30 week belly shot
It’s amazing how much has changed in the 20 weeks since I wrote this post. At 10 weeks, BabyMort weighed about a quarter of an ounce and was about an inch long. Now, she’s about 3 pounds and 16 inches long. Our “little kumquat” has become our “little cabbage.” It doesn’t sound quite as endearing, does it??
I still feel sick a lot, but now it’s heartburn, not morning sickness. The fatigue I thought I was experiencing at 10 weeks is nothing compared to how tired I am now and I still have trouble sleeping (or have trouble again – I had a few months when I felt fairly ‘normal.’) In addition, now my everything hurts and I’ve accepted that I’ll only get more uncomfortable in the coming weeks.
However…I now have the joy of feeling her move around and knowing that “it” is a “her” (although I’d prefer if she’d keep herself out of my ribcage!!) I’m also lucky enough to have had a healthy pregnancy, something I was very worried about at 10 weeks, when we hadn’t even heard her heartbeat yet. The next 10 weeks don’t seem like an eternity away like 30 weeks did. In fact, it feels like we hardly have any time at all to get ready for her arrival!!
Like I said before – We’re getting an amazing little girl out of this, so I can deal. Plus, I’m already 75% of the way through my pregnancy!!
I’ve been feeling guilty, because we’ve only been to the gym 2 or 3 times in the last 6 weeks or so since we found out I was pregnant. And all 2 or 3 times occurred within the first couple weeks before I started feeling tired and then nauseous. I’ve read the literature that says exercising can actually help you feel like you have more energy and can help with morning sickness, constipation and bloating. But translating what I’ve read to real motivation just hasn’t happened.
So my plan: We have another doctor’s appointment on Tuesday. I’ll check with my doctor then to double check the do’s and dont’s. There are a couple classes I like that are offered at our gym, but I know there’s a few things I can’t do in those classes, so I’ll find out if he has suggestions for modifications. I’ve always been more excited/motivated to go to a class then just working out on my own. In addition, theoretically, the nausea and fatigue, to some extent, should go away within a couple weeks, so that should make it easier to get going.
Hopefully things work out the way they do in my head. If I’m still being lazy in a few weeks, I’m counting on all of you to get me going!!